I was reflecting on relationships. Between friends. And I came to a rather brilliant (even if I do say so myself >:]) conclusion on why some people can stay best friends for so long.
1. You excel in different areas
This drastically reduces feelings of jealousy and competitiveness. It is an innate understanding that your best friend is supremely talented in one area but you’re better in another. Hence when your friend does well, it’s with complete and genuine sincerity that you congratulate him/her. And vice-versa.
Alternatively, one of you must really have ZERO competitive instinct and willing to let the other person outshine you all the time. That however, is highly unlikely.
Just occurred to me that another option is – both of you are EQUALLY GOOD. You take turns coming in first or second. Then really, there is no need to feel so jealous of the other person. “Competitiveness” comes into play again, except this time it’s HEALTHY competition. Totally acceptable. Y’know, like Melody and Nick on the first season of So You Think You Can Dance. Soooo cute.
ORRRR, the other person can be better than you in every aspect but you love that person so wholeheartedly you want nothing but the best for the other person. That would be Jean and I. I have had so many people ask me whether I feel inferior to her, teachers perpetually making comparisons between us but I can NEVER bear a grudge against her or something. It’s not her fault she got the bigger brain. Or is skinnier. Better at running. I am incredibly proud of her <3 Like yeah, that’s MY sister.
2. Common interests
Only then will you ALWAYS enjoy spending time together. Like watching hot guys or trying on clothes. Being able to always talk to each other about anything is important too.
3. Inducing the ‘AWWW’ factor
It’s the little sweet things like having somebody always remember to wish you all the best or have fun or plan birthday surprises that make you incredibly grateful to have the other person in your life. And you know you’ll do the same.
4. Let it out
When Maria is unhappy she will simply sms something like “MARIE-THERESE PANG. I HATE YOU……”
HAHAHAHAHA. Yeah I still remember. That was in JH3. She thought I told Jean something I was sworn to secrecy about.
If you don’t dare to tell your friend what’s bothering you, it might keep accumulating. There would be burgeoning grudges or unhappiness that might ultimately cause irreparable damage to your friendship.
But at the same time, don’t be COMPLETELY straightforward. Especially if your comments are mean.
I'm an exception >:D HAHAHAHA. JiaHui once said I can make fun of everybody and get away with it. When I laughed at Mr Iskandar, Ms Oon was like “How do you do it?”
AHAHAHA. I really don’t know. Maybe because I tell my embarrassing incidents to everyone too and I laugh at myself so nobody really takes me seriously. Then again,many people probably take offense and I don't even know. I might have secret haters. HAHA.
5. Cannot be completely whiny
Who the hell wants to listen to someone else talk about themselves the entire time?! My life doesn’t revolve around you and your concerns. It’s nice to be whiny and always have someone comfort you, but after a while no one wants to always want to be your comforter. Go call up tinklefriend to complain about your life or something.
6. Boosting of the ego
That’s the ‘feel-good’ factor. Like how all the indian dancers tell each other constantly "OMG YOU LOOK SO SEXY/HOT"? Yeah, same theory applies. It's just nice to have friends who are supportive.
7. Similar Backgrounds
For example, I would find it hard to be best friends with a staunch Buddhist or something. Not that you can't be FRIENDS, but to relate completely would be difficult. Or if your best friend is extremely poor, you will always have to consider what you're going to eat or where you're going to go. Troublesome.
(NO I AM NOT LOOKING DOWN ON POOR PEOPLE. It's a fact of life.)
No comments:
Post a Comment